Are bad decisions for good reasons truly wrong? I’ve been wondering and can’t find the answers in all the generic ‘right’ ways or places. What if my desires and responsibilities contradict each other, what if my values and principles clash? Without trying to sound too much like a relativist, morality is fluid. Even if the mass stays the same, the (individual) shape will constantly move, morph, change, grow, evolve. Sometimes even back into a previously familiar form. Although backwards growth isn’t possible, this direction of movement can sometimes prove useful. If only to remember, recollect and cherish dearly what once was.
What would you do if you came to the knowledge that your partner, or someone close to you, actively participated in someone else’s sexual abuse, assault or intimidation? Would you still be able to look at them the same, love them the same, feel the same for them? Would you protect (possibly enable) them and keep them around, or take a stand for the sake of humanity and eliminate them from your life?
With so many of the victims coming forward. Encouraged. Inspired. Empowered. So many still covered in the shadows of hurt and shame. Will we not forget to look for the attackers, the assaulters, the predators. Don’t kid yourself. They are all around us. They are your brothers and fathers and uncles and sons. Let’s not pretend it isn’t women too, so look at your sisters, mothers, aunts and daughters. Your cousins, neighbors, friends and partners. In all reality, the high percentage of victims indicates a high percentage of perpetrators. So be sure to take a good look around you, even your most inner circle, and don’t forget yourself…
…and, ask yourself. When you know, will you be idle? Could you forgive yourself, like you’d forgive them, passively?
Stop it with the 2018 magical unicorn rainbow ride
“New year, new me, new life, new goals, new chances, new opportunities, new energy, new ambitions, resolutions, motivation” [new phone, who this?]
Stop it with the “leaving [insert negative notion of reality] in 2017”
Like you haven’t been saying that for every year to come
For what or who?
Some kind of mental warp
We’ve all been conditioned to take a liking to
But it’s not the beginning or ending
Nothing has changed
You’re still the same you
The sky still appears to us as blue
The sun still rises in the east
(that is, in the northern hemisphere at least)
Life is still what you make it
Beauty is still in the eye of the beholder
(Self) Love & kindness are still important
Blessings are still on their way
Prayers are still being heard
Nothing has changed
Except for the numeral counting on a human construction
[date] If only we could swipe that left, right?
All that you fear, you can overcome
All that you overcome, cannot hurt you
Anything you fear, will not have any power over you, as soon as you have overcome
That is where your focus should be
You know that moment when you’re doing something a bit dangerous, perhaps risky even, demanding the most of your attention, focus and alertness. Then someone with seemingly helpful intentions, from the sideline, starts giving you advice and nudges of intended empowerment, probably warn you to be cautious as they’re at it.
Most likely causing you to divert your attention, shift your focus by that exact nudge they give, flock from your alertness just a second, as to take into consideration what’s being offered to you. Because you don’t want to seem ungrateful, because you appreciate their care and input, because they are important to you. Chances are that exactly then is when things start to go wrong.
Realize this deep and well: focus on yourself and what you’re doing for what you want. Nobody is living exactly your life, but you, so it’s upto you and only you, to block out anything holding you back or drifting you off your aim.
Recognize true support, it never comes as distraction.
Tolerate nothing that stands in your way or turns out to sabotage your progress. This is your own responsibility, your choice and you have to deal with it your way. People will always think they’re just being kind and helping you. It’s yours to say what’s actually helpful and what isn’t, and you are allowed to dismiss what isn’t progressive to YOU.
Nobody but you knows what you need, to do what you need to do. Nobody but you has the grip, the handle, the control and the power for your own life.
Nobody but you.
Remember this when taking in well meant advice. Remember this when listening to sideliners empowering or warning you. Remember this when you need help, you decide what’s helpful or not.
Not them. Never them. However well meant. It’s all you and your own in the end.
I don’t think I’ll ever stop writing about long distance relationships, until I’m finally released from one. Love crosses borders like the wind, with ease and we allow it to sway us away, as we please. Many might not last but when they do, it’s as romantic and exhilarating as it is terrorizing, terrifying and destructive. Because all that you feel won’t ever fade away as long as you know it’s true. Maintaining equal amounts of love, trust, respect and communication is essential and impossible in the same extent.
We grew closer than I’ve ever been to any other soul, than I’ve ever allowed another near my core of cores. I’ve caught myself underestimating the true essence of this power we both share. So pure a love that it makes the universe stop and stare. In the eventual awareness of this, I know you are made of the same fire as I. We burst from the same flame and traveled around the globe through epic places and times until our hearts met again in the most twisted circumstances. Only to realize, this was all for us, ours, all along.
I believe true freedom is a very simple conceptual state of being.
You don’t need much to be free, you actually need less than you always thought you did.
It’s a state of mind in the sense that you start off by releasing yourself from cranial captivity, bending the mental bars and breaking through.
It manifests in a state of being by not only thinking, but also speaking, doing and most importantly feeling freely. I say most importantly about feeling, because without that emotional acceptance and awareness, you can think, speak and do as freely what you want, but you’ll never feel free if you don’t feel freely.
Be free, we all are, in the littlest ways, in the simplest things. It doesn’t have to be grand of complicated, focus on one thing to be free in, and expand your freedom from there.
Everything really great starts out a little scary.
Everything worth trying seems ridiculous at some point.
The value is determined by the effort it takes.
The outcome relies on too many factors combined to be calculated.
But the importance always resides,
in the emotional intention behind everything.
Don’t confuse courage with impulsiveness.
Being fearless means not much when it doesn’t come from fear first. Any breakthrough will only matter, if it’s made both mental and emotional.
Thinking things through is as important as following your heart. Because in your soul, the two combine. Cognition plus emotion form what you consider as self. All ego aside, you will need that self to be who you are and become who you want to be. There is no moment when you’ll have any of these figured out. It’s an continuous proces, we like to call it life. And it’s clearly not about getting somewhere, but it is about going.
Are you supposed to be thankful for something you didn’t want or ask for? Whether it’s good or bad to you, whether it’s well intended or not.
Should you only be thankful for things that are good for you? Or only the ones that were well intended, regardless of the result? Or should you just be thankful for everything that happens and comes to you? Because everything has a reason, a cause, a goal, a purpose.