Are bad decisions for good reasons truly wrong? I’ve been wondering and can’t find the answers in all the generic ‘right’ ways or places. What if my desires and responsibilities contradict each other, what if my values and principles clash? Without trying to sound too much like a relativist, morality is fluid. Even if the mass stays the same, the (individual) shape will constantly move, morph, change, grow, evolve. Sometimes even back into a previously familiar form. Although backwards growth isn’t possible, this direction of movement can sometimes prove useful. If only to remember, recollect and cherish dearly what once was.
Nobody but you
You know that moment when you’re doing something a bit dangerous, perhaps risky even, demanding the most of your attention, focus and alertness. Then someone with seemingly helpful intentions, from the sideline, starts giving you advice and nudges of intended empowerment, probably warn you to be cautious as they’re at it.
Most likely causing you to divert your attention, shift your focus by that exact nudge they give, flock from your alertness just a second, as to take into consideration what’s being offered to you. Because you don’t want to seem ungrateful, because you appreciate their care and input, because they are important to you. Chances are that exactly then is when things start to go wrong.
Realize this deep and well: focus on yourself and what you’re doing for what you want. Nobody is living exactly your life, but you, so it’s upto you and only you, to block out anything holding you back or drifting you off your aim.
Recognize true support, it never comes as distraction.
Tolerate nothing that stands in your way or turns out to sabotage your progress. This is your own responsibility, your choice and you have to deal with it your way. People will always think they’re just being kind and helping you. It’s yours to say what’s actually helpful and what isn’t, and you are allowed to dismiss what isn’t progressive to YOU.
Nobody but you knows what you need, to do what you need to do. Nobody but you has the grip, the handle, the control and the power for your own life.
Nobody but you.
Remember this when taking in well meant advice. Remember this when listening to sideliners empowering or warning you. Remember this when you need help, you decide what’s helpful or not.
Not them. Never them. However well meant. It’s all you and your own in the end.
I’ve hurt you so badly
I don’t even want to say sorry
Because no amount of remorse
Could ever undo the hurt
Don’t have a press rewind button
I feel so abandoned
Whatever I did wrong
Didn’t come from me
Violated and abused
Nobody cares for the villain
Because once I unleash my fire
I’m not worth humanity anymore
Would be better if I cease to exist
Because there’s no way to get this fixed