Keep myself on a level
To where no man can travel
No one would be able
To handle what I have
No matter how calm or stable
They’ll only get through half
The other part stays on lock
Cause I don’t need to get stuck
In some other person’s life again
Got myself to live with
And that’s already more than
I can handle or care for
Don’t feel the need to share more
Cause it doesn’t bring me nothing new or good
Knowing better is what I always do or should
And if somehow I fall
In love or in darkness
I’ll get up with no help at all
Because I’d rather be heartless
Just to make sure I get scarred less
The Heart
– heartfelt poetry
Ready
Time for a fresh start
A new view
Roads less hard
To follow or pursue
You can travel a milion miles
Only to find nothing more
Than what has been here all the while
Just waiting in front of your door
Sometimes the little things we see every day
And don’t notice as special or outstanding
Are the things that can take our breath away
Even beyond our wildest wishes and understanding
Train me, tame me, tie me down
Teach me to love and cherish
Without a fear or frown
I don’t care to drown
Cause I’ve been to the bottom
And swam back to the top again
So I’m ready to become
Someone who dares and can
Newsflash
lovely ugly rain, straining down my window pane
you aim to see me drain, or drown
but I can see the flames, go down
and in my brain I remain, static
I don’t fear the pain, so dramatic
you can tear in vain, I won’t panic
cause I am way to sane, and dynamic
you don’t know what it looks like, or ought to
I have nothing to prove right, so I forgot you
and all your no use fights
you thought you thought through
you know it’s not who
starts or ends
or is heartless within
the farther you went
the more you would lose
and the part that you win
is the force of abuse
the margin of sin
you pour, I refuse
stop acting so clueless
I’ve recovered from my bruises
and you can’t make me move less
guess you didn’t see my newsflash
I’m only doing what I do best : )
Broken Core
Filled with flames of anger
Agressively aggitated and furious
A heart so hurt it lost purpose
A soul so scarred and tangled
It’s now unrecognisable
Though aware the disguise would once fall
We kept on pretending to try
You continuously neglecting my cries
I constantly defending your lies
But what does one do when..
Your worst enemy is the one you are
What is there to know when..
Your own mind speaks nothing but hatred
Where can one go when..
Your own hands tore up the road that you follow
Where is one to hide when..
Your own feet crushed the roof above you
When you have no one…
to trust or believe in?
When even your own self…
is out to take you down?
How do you manage?
To what can one hold on?
I was taught to trust in love
But sadly enough
Just the wrong sort of
The love I clung to
Was a selfish prideful shimmer
Merely an image
Of what I wanted so badly to have
No reality, no truth at all
Just the wish telling the tale
A broken core to follow the fall
But something’s leaking from the cracks
Flowing fastly, building up in stacks
It’s a sweet fluid
Soft and thick and dark
It has a taste of home in it
Like hitting something sharp
It tells me where to go now
It tells me not to stop
Leave behind all the baggage I’ve been carrying
And get ahead with what I’ve got
Even if it’s not much
Nothing more than my body, mind and soul
Had to leave my heart behind
It was too heavy and my bag was full
Salt
It burns in my chest
I don’t know how to cry anymore
Or how to feel what I felt last
I’ve lost love before
But I never feared I’d miss violence
Cause that’s what you imply
You have a side so evil
And I’m not exactly in my right mind
Together we’re more than lethal
But it’s the only real thing
That I’ve ever known
I can’t express in words
How this hurt feels
How I hate that I could not defend
Myself again
Against your angry hands
Not because I don’t love myself
But because you are stronger always
I wish I could have done something
To not let my weakness win
But fighting you is a sign
Of being suicidal
And I want to live now more than ever
Because you took my freedom
And my safety and my trust and all I had
You tore it apart
Because in your thoughts
I don’t deserve to have anything
On purpose you cursed me
With what you call love and so on
You wouldn’t leave or let me run
Forcing me to swallow your hatred
And take from me what’s sacred
My innocense and pride
Glad to say I’m still alive
You couldn’t take from me
What you want and miss now so bad
>My love, my heart you’ll never have
And I will haunt you with that
My presence will be the salt in your wounds
That you carved in your own skin
And will never grow to scars
Cause I’ll be sure to keep them open
Silent Revenge
I should’ve ragged the blade through your face
When I had the chance for it
When you laid asleep next to me
Before you could fire your rage against me
Next time you dare to care to come around
I got a surprise, I promise
You won’t see it coming
When you try to act up or hurt me again
I got a bullet here waiting
With your initials on it
My revenge is silent and motionless
Like when your body falls
Emotionless
And I will never regret it
Because it’s only justice
My way to deal with
What you did
Trainwrecks of Thoughts
take my breath away
cause it hurts and aches
and I don’t care for it anymore
I want to be more than before
you should keep your distance
cause in an instant
I can turn violent on you
even though I don’t want to
and I don’t deal with regret
it’s a selfish & senseless act
and I hate a powerless feeling
cause it’s doesn’t provide healing
I just want my lungs gone
with my heart I’m also done
I have no need for it
will live solely by courage
and fed by frustration
a severe separation
of the morbid mind
where there is no flaw to find
I long so long for peace
but am bound by this disease
these trainwrecks of thoughts
restraining from what I ought
still my movements are empty
and your hatred only tempts me
to stack up strength
and reach for revenge
fear for what will follow
the words you read are hollow
but the sensation it gives you
is worse than you can live through
Beautiful Night
The world is so beautiful when it’s night
The darkness pulls me in and holds me tight
The nocturnal breeze is so clear and bright
It almost makes me feel alive
It allows me to grow fearlessly like
A blossom in the daylight
No pain or anger, dispair of fright
No rain, no failure, just air and pride
Finally, I dare to fight
For what I am so far
No longer waiting
But aiming, for that shooting star
Restrain from hating
There’s a lesson behind each scar
With every second I learn
With every breath I grow
I’m at a point of no return
Forward is the only way to go
Strength and faith
Is all I want and know
Chances to take
And choices to make
That’s all I see
The only thing on my mind
Is to be and stay free
And leave the hurt behind
To restrictions I’m blind
Only open to possibilities
Value all my abilities
And let no one come between myself and I
Train myself to fly
Beyond the sky
Out of sight for the unfit eye
No longer ashamed to cry
Because I aim high
And know these tears will dry
As long as I don’t give up to try
Poem of Inspiration
Today I would like to share with you a poem I wrote last night. It represents my current attitude, my mental state is elevated.
Inspired by someone I know, I’ve put it to words:
“You make me want to achieve something
You make me want to work & fight & strive
You make me believe in the power of wanting
You inspire me to make something of my life
And all just by looking at you
And all you’ve done and all you do
It doesn’t make me jealous
It doesn’t make me feel I am less
It just makes me want to be more
Try harder, have a goal to go for
Grow farther
Towards where no one has been before
And beyond
Do what I really want
And what I’m good at
Be smart, keep my mind set
Never regret, and never forget
Pride is something I always had
Now it’s time to put it to good use
If I don’t try to win
I will definetly lose
And that’s something
I simply refuse
So I’m going all in
To follow what I choose
Thanks for the inspiration
Heartfelt without hesitation
One day you’ll catch my appreciation
I promise this, without exaggeration”
I hope you liked it.. In my next post I’ll try to explain why and how I came to name my blog ‘Truth Beyond Mystery’ (:
My thought of the day:
Everything implies access to possibilities.
Possibilities imply access to everything.
Truth Beyond Mystery 